From Disconnected to Deeply in Love: A 20-Year Marriage Redeemed
How One Couple Went from Surviving to Thriving with LF3 Love Factor
“I love you, but I don’t like you right now.”
Those were the words Lisa blurted out at the dinner table one random Wednesday night, fork mid-air, staring at her husband, Jake, over a plate of slightly overcooked spaghetti.Jake, a man who had once wooed her with grand romantic gestures and handwritten love letters (before kids, before exhaustion, before life), looked up from his phone, blinked twice, and simply replied, “Wait… what?” Lisa sighed. “I mean, do you even like me anymore? I feel like we’re just two people co-parenting, running a three-ring circus.” She motioned toward their kids—Tyler (16, moody and mysterious), Ava (12, constantly debating everything), and Ben (7, a human wrecking ball of energy). Jake scratched his head. “Of course, I like you… I think?” And that’s when it hit them.They had been married for 20 years. They had survived diaper blowouts, sleepless nights, soccer tournaments, tween drama, teenage angst, and an ungodly amount of laundry. But somewhere between “I do” and “Did you pay the electric bill?”—they had lost each other.
The Slow Drift Apart
It hadn’t happened overnight. It never does. Lisa and Jake had started their marriage like a Nicholas Sparks novel—romantic dates, long conversations, endless laughter. But then life happened. Lisa became the household CEO, managing homework, meal planning, and locating lost shoes (seriously, how do kids lose ONE shoe?!). Jake, a hardworking provider, buried himself in work, trying to ensure financial security for their family. Somewhere along the way, their quick kisses turned into head nods. Their deep conversations became surface-level check-ins. Their date nights turned into PTA meetings and grocery runs. They weren’t fighting. But they weren’t connecting either. And that night at dinner? That was their wake-up call.
LF3 Love Factor: The Last-Ditch Effort
Lisa, ever the problem solver, took to Google and searched “Marriage help when you don’t even know where to start.” Enter Love Factor. It promised to reignite connection, rebuild emotional intimacy, and transform a marriage from surviving to thriving. Lisa was intrigued. Jake? Skeptical. “I mean… are they going to make us hold hands and stare into each other’s eyes for an uncomfortable amount of time?” he asked. Lisa shrugged. “Maybe. But we stare at our phones all day. What if we actually look at each other for once?” Touché. So, with one last ounce of hope (and a shared desire to avoid an expensive divorce), they signed up.
Lesson #1: Love is a Choice (Even When You Don’t Feel It)
Week One of Love Factor hit them with the truth bomb they didn’t want but desperately needed:
💡 Love isn’t just a feeling—it’s a daily choice.
At first, Lisa was annoyed. “Great. Now love is just another thing I have to check off my to-do list,” she muttered. But then they learned something mind-blowing: Small, intentional choices lead to BIG emotional shifts.
✔️ Saying “Good morning” with warmth instead of just grunting.
✔️ Sending a random “Thinking of you” text.
✔️ Acknowledging each other’s hard work—whether at home or at work.
It wasn’t about grand romantic gestures. It was about tiny moments of appreciation that built a foundation of love again. Jake, feeling inspired, left Lisa a sticky note on her coffee cup that said, “You’re an amazing mom. And you still look hot in those yoga pants.” Lisa laughed for the first time in weeks.
Lesson #2: Connection Requires Time (Yes, Even When You’re Busy)
Jake and Lisa realized they had plenty of time for their kids, jobs, and responsibilities—but no time for each other. Love Factor challenged them to prioritize connection through weekly date nights, daily 10-minute check-ins, and intentional physical affection. “Wait, we have to touch each other?” Jake asked. “Yes, genius,” Lisa rolled her eyes. “That’s kind of the point of marriage.”
So they started small:
✔️ 10-second hugs every morning. (It felt weird at first, but soon became their favorite part of the day.)
✔️ Uninterrupted coffee time on Saturday mornings.
✔️ A 30-minute “no kid talk” rule during dinner.
Slowly, their marriage started to feel less like a business partnership and more like a love story again.
Lesson #3: Fighting Fair (Instead of Fighting to Win)
One of their biggest problems? They didn’t fight—they just avoided hard conversations. Love Factor taught them how to disagree without disconnecting.
✔️ Listen first. No interrupting, no eye-rolling, no sighing like a dramatic teenager.
✔️ Express, don’t accuse. Instead of “You never help me,” say, “I feel overwhelmed and need your support.”
✔️ Find solutions together. Not “Who’s right?” but “How do we fix this?”
One night, after a rough day, Lisa said, “I just need a break.” Jake, instead of getting defensive, simply said, “I got the kids. Go take a bath.” And just like that, a simple act of kindness melted away the tension.
The Transformation: From Surviving to Thriving
After several months of intentional effort, something incredible happened.
✔️ They started laughing again.
✔️ They looked at each other—not just as co-parents—but as best friends and lovers.
✔️ They felt lighter, happier, more in sync.
Their kids noticed, too. One night, Ava (12) sighed dramatically and said, “Ugh, you guys are so cute now. It’s weird.” Jake smirked. “Weird? Or awesome?” Tyler (16) chimed in, “Honestly? It’s nice. You guys used to feel… tense all the time. But now? You actually like each other.” Lisa’s heart swelled. Their marriage wasn’t just about them—it was shaping the emotional security of their children, too.
Happily Ever After (But Still a Work in Progress)
Jake and Lisa aren’t perfect. They still have bad days. They still argue over what’s for dinner. They still occasionally forget date night. But now?
✔️ They don’t just survive their marriage—they thrive in it.
✔️ They show their kids what real love looks like—not just in the easy times, but in the hard ones, too.
✔️ They wake up every day and choose each other—on purpose, with purpose.
And to think… it all started with a plate of overcooked spaghetti and one brutally honest question:
“Do you even like me anymore?”
Now? The answer is clear.
“I don’t just like you. I love you. And I’m never letting us drift apart again.”
