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Raising kids is a beautiful yet demanding, time-consuming, and overwhelming experience. Changing diapers, preparing healthy lunches, ensuring the kids are ready for school, and waking up late at night when they cry isn’t only stressful but can also affect your marriage.
While being so busy with kids, you often forget that you’re living with a spouse who needs your attention, love, and your time together. You rarely talk, but if you do, it’s about the kids, work, and the heavy topics, not about love, the beautiful moments you had in the past, flirting, and no touching or hugging. It distances you both from one another, gradually affecting your relationship negatively. This leads us to a question: how to stay connected as a couple while raising kids? We’ll teach you that in this post.
How To Stay Connected As A Couple While Raising Kids?
Little ones are hard to deal with, and they consume most of your time. But, don’t let parenting overshadow your love in your marriage, or it may turn in directions you would never want it to go.
These are the tips to stay connected as a couple, keeping the intimacy, love, compassion, and the spark alive while raising kids.
Keep Gratitude Alive
Always say “Thank you” to your partner when they do even the small things for you. If they help you with cleaning, preparing the kids’ lunch, or just open the door for you when you’re going out, show your heartfelt and genuine gratitude to them.
It makes them feel valued and respected. That keeps them closer to you and to continue doing the right thing for the same appreciation again.
Listen With Heart
When you have disagreements and your partner is expressing them in front of you, stay calm and listen carefully. When it’s your part to explain, use the word “I feel” instead of blaming them.
Don’t use their weakness against them and listen to understand, not to argue. If you’re too upset and afraid that you may say something wrong, take a break until you’re in your senses to reply.
Make Your Partner Feel Loved
Everyone needs love and care to feel close. Learn how your partner feels loved and try to understand their different moods, and then respond to them accordingly with kindness. Small things such as hugs, saying kind words or writing notes for them help them feel loved and cared for, which keeps you both closer.
Focus Only On The Good Things
Focus only on the good things in your partner, not the bad ones. Don’t try to look for what’s missing or wrong, but what’s right and good in them. Whenever you find anything good, appreciate it and praise it.
This positive attitude will ensure that the love is alive between you both despite so many responsibilities and the work for the kids.
Add Fun to Everyday Life
Don’t wait until you have time for fancy or expensive activities; try to create fun in everyday life. The laughter and the play keep the couple happy and connected. Give long hugs, share a healing touch, and comfort each other.
Relive Disney trips, watch videos, look at photos of your marriage or any other special occasion and reminisce.
You can have family dinners together, including the kids, which will build a strong connection among you all. Turn off the TV when you’re sitting with your spouse and try to talk to them instead. Listen to them, share your feelings, and let them express theirs.
Plan Special Dessert Nights
Plan special dessert nights at home or outside after putting the kids to bed. The rules should be simple: No kid talk, no work talk, no heavy topics or other worldly responsibility discussion. This night has to be only about you and your loved one.
Focus on fun, light, and sweet conversation. Laugh, hug, hold hands, and reconnect with each other, living your life to the fullest. It creates an unbreakable connection between you both.
Build Together with Creative Projects
Decide on small projects, such as photo albums or crafts, and do them together. Painting, sorting, and displaying pictures with your spouse builds memories and creates joyful moments. When you collaborate, it adds teamwork and connection to both.
Keep Traditions Alive
Try not to skip traditional events, such as the 4th of July party, and attend them with your partner. Go together to enjoy private moments. It creates memories that everyone looks forward to, including yourself and your partner.
Share a Hobby, Share a Bond
Ask your partner about their interests and tell them yours, and then plan to do it together. It could be a hobby, a sport, or anything new that you both can discover and try. The shared hobbies and activities together create more bonding opportunities.
Final Words
How to stay connected as a couple while raising kids? A question that every other couple asks as raising kids consumes a lot of energy, time, and keeps you busy. Therefore, you tend to spend little or no time together, only talking about business, kids, and work.
To stay connected with your spouse despite the kids’ activities, try to say thank you often, listen calmly in arguments, show daily love and care, and focus on the good in each other.
You can also focus on having fun in daily life, plan dessert nights together, do creative projects as a couple, and celebrate traditions every year. And don’t forget to enjoy a shared hobby and make time for intimacy..
FAQ
How to connect with your partner when you have kids?
Make small daily efforts like hugs, thank yous, laughing, or sharing a meal, so you remember you are more than just parents.
What are the hardest years of marriage with kids?
The baby and toddler years are the toughest because no sleep, constant stress, and little time together pull you apart fast.
How to leave a relationship when you are still in love and have a child?
It hurts deeply, but you set clear boundaries, co-parent with respect, and accept that love does not always mean staying.
How to maintain the link with a partner when you have kids?
Keep dating each other in small ways, talk, touch, share jokes, and make sure the daily chaos does not affect your love.